All Was Not Revealed!

If you are sensitive or have small children don’t let them read any further. If you are faint of heart, read no further. If you have no desire to experience a full blown, Rubicon rant, read no further. If you believe that Dick Cheney should be president, loves small children, puppies, kitties, and was not the victim of a black heart transplant during his last by-pass surgery, read no further.

I warned you. I am not responsible for any ill effects that may come from reading further.

I am convinced that the people who write “Battlestar Galactica” (BSG for those in the know) are galactic bastards! Apart from “Law & Order: Criminal Intent”, “The Closer”, “Psych” and “Burn Notice”, BSG is on my short list of shows not to miss. (The one thing in common, none of these shows are currently on network t.v.) The writing is clever; The plot intriguing; The storytelling intelligent and adult – all things that are a death sentence on network t.v.

I had mourned the fact that this would be BSG’s final season. The story arc had come to an end. I had made peace with all of it. I had even begun to relish the fact that we would finally discover who the final five Cylons were. I was actually looking forward to the survivors finding earth and the Lost Colony.

One thing I had not counted on was the writer’s strike and how it could prolong my suffering. I had stopped watching network t.v. long ago with a few rare exceptions. Quite frankly, I was surprised that network t.v. employed writers with the plethora of crap reality t.v. programming.

A side rant…. If what passes for “reality” in the reality t.v. programming is in fact a true representation of mainstream reality, no wonder I feel as if I should be in a rubber room most of the time.

I had grown accustomed to realizing that some of my baser misanthropic impulses were justified in the face of “Survivor: Diarrhea Island”; “America’s Got Bad Taste On Steroids”, “Polygamous Bachelorette with Flavor Flav”, and the brain trust that allowed a program slot to be wasted on that lousy “Bionic Woman” remake. I saw my basic cable gems as salvation from “Survivor: T.V. is Crap Island”. Then, the only networks who actually employ writers, fell victims to a strike.

I waited for my last season of BSG. I lit candles to St. Cathode Raytubus Televisonis for a quick and early end to the strike. When it came, I lit more candles of thanksgiving – all due to the promise that “all (ALL – as in everything) would be revealed”. Imagine my shock, horror, disappointment, and sadness when, at the end of the season last Friday – ALL WAS NOT REVEALED! Not only was ALL not revealed, but I found that there will be ANOTHER season, but not until 2009!

I can only surmise that the BSG crew is taking their cues from another torturous bastard – Dick Cheney. Only something so evil, so dastardly, so painful could have been conceive in a dark and evil mind such as his. Only someone who could believe that water boarding isn’t torture could believe that ALL does not include everything. Only someone who could say that we need to go to war with Iraq because they have WMDs, only when we didn’t find WMDs go on to say we didn’t go to war in Iraq because of WMDs could say that when we said “all will be revealed” we didn’t really mean all it was just a figure of speech.

Whew! I am done now. It felt good to get that off my chest. I think I can make it until the 2009 BSG season now.